How my heart would hurt if those words ever came out of Caleb's mouth.
I have heard of a story where this happened to a white couple who adopted black children. Out of the mouths of babes, right?
Why the problem? At face value, to a white woman, I would be encouraged to hear this, knowing that his ethnic difference from the family was the focus of his upbringing, that he was loved simply because he was a child that God had created and because he is a part of our family.
What a disservice we would be doing to him if we didn't teach him about his heritage. He is African American being raised by a white family, there will be enough confusion in that, let's at least teach him to appreciate his heritage.
Not only it is a disservice, but it is unbiblical to "act colorblind." People who say that they are, are lying and wrong. Really? Like you can't notice that I have a black boy in my arms? God created cultures and elasticities and celebrates them throughout scripture, why shouldn't we raise Caleb the same way?
Saying that, our goal will not be to point out Caleb's differences, but to love him as best as we can, to parent him as best as we can, to raise him in our own familial traditions, as well as being real with his heritage. We want to be open and honest with Caleb, answering any questions he may have, about his birth family, adopted family, questions about adoption, his black heritage and anything else that he is wondering. We don't want to hide anything. I hope he lets be on a learning curve, because I have no idea how to do this:)
Now that I got that off my chest....I can cuddle with my peanut who decided to grow overnight and stretch out of preemie clothes and move into newborn sizes. This mumma's heart is not ready for her boy to grow so fast.
I have heard of a story where this happened to a white couple who adopted black children. Out of the mouths of babes, right?
Why the problem? At face value, to a white woman, I would be encouraged to hear this, knowing that his ethnic difference from the family was the focus of his upbringing, that he was loved simply because he was a child that God had created and because he is a part of our family.
What a disservice we would be doing to him if we didn't teach him about his heritage. He is African American being raised by a white family, there will be enough confusion in that, let's at least teach him to appreciate his heritage.
Not only it is a disservice, but it is unbiblical to "act colorblind." People who say that they are, are lying and wrong. Really? Like you can't notice that I have a black boy in my arms? God created cultures and elasticities and celebrates them throughout scripture, why shouldn't we raise Caleb the same way?
Saying that, our goal will not be to point out Caleb's differences, but to love him as best as we can, to parent him as best as we can, to raise him in our own familial traditions, as well as being real with his heritage. We want to be open and honest with Caleb, answering any questions he may have, about his birth family, adopted family, questions about adoption, his black heritage and anything else that he is wondering. We don't want to hide anything. I hope he lets be on a learning curve, because I have no idea how to do this:)
Now that I got that off my chest....I can cuddle with my peanut who decided to grow overnight and stretch out of preemie clothes and move into newborn sizes. This mumma's heart is not ready for her boy to grow so fast.
2 comments:
Beautiful words. He will grow up wonderfully.
Hi Kristin,
I somehow ran into your website, I think from couch to 5k. Anyway, of course my first thought when I saw your pics is 'what is this white woman doing with this little black baby boy.. looking very happy I might add..?' So I read your entire blog (the adoption piece anyway..) First, what a beautiful example of God's love - thanks for sharing that. I am a Christian woman but have always struggled with issues of colour (I'm black, from Bermuda). I'm certain my struggle has to do with my upbringing... and God continues to change me from the inside out - praise the Lord..!
In any case, I just read this post and it made me choke with tears because I could just hear the love of God flowing from your heart. It's clear that you LOVE the Lord and you LOVE your son. Thanks for showing that love in itself is colourblind, but that you are not ignoring your sons natural heritage and will endeavour to teach him about that aspect of his life. But.. as our pastor often reminds us, if we choose to only go back to our natural heritage, we cut ourselves short, as our true heritage comes from the Lord.
What a blessed boy little Caleb is and will continue to be as you focus on both, the natural & the spiritual. I wish you God's very best as you and your family continue on this journey....
Love from,
A sister in Bermuda who is in awe of your obedience to serve the Lord in this way...
Crystal Burgess
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