Favorite (MOST of them) Memories in 2010 (via photos)

Our first family picture. We had met Caleb minutes before this picture. He was almost 3 weeks old, weighing 3lbs. What a surprise!!!

This picture means so much to me. One of the first time I saw my boy with his eyes open. I have my "Noelle Ring" on, still grieving the loss of my baby girl, while holding my new baby boy.

First Bath

He still has that serious look....a lot. 

6 weeks old

We found out that Caleb's birth mother's rights were terminated and.....Caleb was home to stay. We celebrated with our dear friends and neighbors:) 

Caleb was excited to visit Gramma Kath's second grade classroom

One of my dear, dear, best friends came to visit this summer:) She lives too, too, far away in OR. 

The first time I walked into his room and saw him standing!!

I have an absolutely beautiful sister

Family picture

I love this picture of my brother and sister in law

Found my baby and my dad snuggling together on Christmas 

He is ONE!

Fulfilled a dream of riding an elephant.

Ok, cute picture, right? 

And again, pretty cute. 

So this post is not entirely true. I don't have photos with some of my favorite people, which makes me really sad. Some of my memories are that....memories in my head.  Some beautiful times with friends, family, colleagues and the Lord. My sister's wedding was another great memory..... What a nostalgic time. 

Wordless Wednesday (Christmas Recap)

Today I shed a tear

Because my baby turned a big boy. We have been waiting a WHOLE year for his FIRST hair cut..

One

It is hard to believe that one year ago today I was coming to terms with the idea that God was not going to give us a baby for Christmas. I was struggling through the holidays, with faith, that eventually we will be a part of pursuing God's kingdom by caring for orphans. Just not that year. Holidays can be emotional anyways when you are grieving the loss of someone. In many ways, I was grieving the loss of Noelle, but in more ways I was grieving my prayer life. I thought for sure I had God say we would have a baby for Christmas. I was questioning my faith and whether or not prayer even worked.

Little did I know, an hour a way, there was a scared woman, in labor 3 months early. She had been in the hospital for a few weeks prior to Christmas, but decided (against the advice of the hospital) to leave the hospital, to go home to spend Christmas with her family. She found herself back in the hospital in labor. One

December 27, my son was born. I did not know he even existed at that time. Jon and I were even talking about going through foster care and other means of opening our homes up for children. He was born 3 months early at a whopping 3lbs! It wouldn't be until January 9th that we heard about our Caleb boy, but today, we celebrate his birth!

Today, Mr. Caleb, you are the light of our lives. You mean more to us that we could ever ask for or even explain to you. You have given us such joy and we cannot imagine life without you. We are slowly navigating how to be parents, specifically how to be white parents to an African American boy. We want you to know and appreciate your culture. We want you to love it, it is how God has created you. Wen want you to grow up to be a man that pursues Jesus with all of his heart, a man of prayer and a man that know the Word. We want you to feel like you can always come home, that you can come to us with anything and that your parents will be your support system.

Today....you are almost 20lbs, you are putting syllables together to form words, crawling like crazy, walking between the furniture, LOVING your new Christmas gifts, eating everything, sleeping 10 hours a night, taking 1-2 naps throughout the day, have 2 teeth and a contagious smile.

Today....we are going to cut your hair.

Today.....we celebrate you baby boy.

Back to reality

Now that Christmas is over.....

-planning a 1st Birthday party for a pretty special boy in my life
-cleaning the disaster zone that Christmas left in my house
-WORKING OUT AND EATING FRUITS AND VEGGIES!
-Turning my office into a play room and my laundry room into an office
-Taking Christmas decor down

So, who want to help with the re-decorating?

Wordless Wednesday (An Early Wowzer Christmas)

Traditions

As we celebrate our first Christmas as a family of three, I can't help but think about Christmas traditions. What do we want to be doing this year and have as an ongoing tradition for Caleb to experience and to celebrate with us?

Here are some family traditions that we keep:

Christmas Eve: It starts off early. The sisters and my dad get up before it is light out and head to the HoneyBaked Ham Store, wait in line in the freezing cold to get a scrumptious ham. Once we get the ham we do some last minute shopping with all the crazies:)  ALWAYS going to church, a beautiful candle light, worshipful, musical setting to celebrate Jesus. We come back to my parents house and have hor'durves and wine. Every year we open up 1 gift--Christmas pajamas.Mom always gets a Santa on Christmas Eve. She is collecting them and has some beautiful ones. Maybe I should take some pictures of them this year, Wendi?  All 3 sisters sleep in the same bed waiting for Santa to arrive. Yes, I even have done this since moving out, getting married, and being 26 years old. I doubt that this year will be any different.

Christmas Day: crazy frenzy!!! No one is allowed to go into the family room until mom and dad say it is ok. When we walk in, Christmas music is always playing with gifts galore. No really, Toy's R Us looks poor compared to Santa coming to our house. I will prove it this year:) My mom is a little excited about Christmas shopping. Anyways, we open our stockings and then we get to the gifts....one person at a time. Mom always gets a calendar. We clean up the mess and head up to grandma and grandpa's house (10 minutes away) where we have breakfast with them, my great aunt, my aunt and uncle and cousins. We always have eggs, toast, coffee and cinnamon rolls. Every. Year. Fabulous. After breakfast we open more stockings.Well, the stockings at grandma's are actually gift bags.  And more gifts. Then we clean up the mess and go back to my parents house...and clean up more....and then take a nap. After our naps....we get ready for Christmas dinner, then eat the Christmas dinner and then end up having some great quality family time.

This year: I want to read the Christmas story to my son with my husband. I want to pray and worship together. And...ofcourse, all of the other amazing great traditions!!!

What traditions do you have???

(REPOST) A baby for Christmas

Many of you have been walking this journey with us. The journey of pursuing Jesus through adoption. The journey of caring for orphans. The journey of heartbreak. The journey of trust. This blog is a repost from last year at this time. My how things have changed. 

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Selfishly, I want to throw a giant pity party for myself--and you would be invited. But I'm not, so you don't need to post it on your calendar:) I thought I would save you all some trouble.

All I wanted for Christmas was a baby. A baby that had no home. I wanted to dress this baby up in Christmas dress clothes, take Christmas pictures and send out family Christmas cards, from the 3 of us. Right now, there is an ache in my heart as I celebrate Christmas with my family of 2 instead.

I don't know why we don't have a baby this Christmas. I don't know why God chose to close this door. I don't know why this is not the Christmas that I will become a proud mama.

But there is a baby.

A baby that brought hope.

A baby that brought reconciliation.

A baby that brought redemption.

A baby that brought peace.

A baby that grew up to give His life for me

A baby that was born fully man and fully God.

And because of that baby, I can celebrate Christmas.

Blogworthy

Maybe you have to know my family. Or maybe just my dad. Or maybe this letter really is the example of cheese. Whatever the reason, I about died reading the Christmas letter my parents sent out, so....here it is for all my blog friends to read:

Hard the Herald Watt Angels Sing...We certainly have a lot to be singing about this year. With 2 new additions to the family we need to make room at the in. Kristin and Jon will no longer be having Silent Nights at their household. They received a call from (name) Adoption Agency  on the 9th of January. They did not have to ask What Child Is This, they knew it was the child that God wanted them to raise and provide for. After 6 weeks in the neonatal intensive care unit, at (hospital) in (city). It Became Upon a Midnight Clear that Caleb Robert (CJ) would be going home with his mom and dad. Everything became "official" on Monday November 15th in (city). Kathy was so excited and overcome with emotion it was almost like Grandma got run over by a reindeer. 


In October We Heard the Bells not on Christmas Day but on Jenna's wedding day. Jenna married Nolan on Oct. 2 at Tullymore Golf Club in Canadian Lakes. Jenna has been singing Joy to the World because in May she graduated and is now an RN at Port Huron Hospital in the maternity ward. She gets the opportunity almost on a daily basis to wrap babies in swaddling clothes. Nolan is working towards becoming a golf pro and is currently working at The Elks Golf Course. Jon is excited because all he wants for Christmas is someone to help him with his golf game. 


Now, unto the Littlest Angel, our Jalissa Joy to the World. She keeps us busy attending all of her activities. Jalissa is still involved with travel softball, pitching lessons, no add a fall volleyball schedule and a new love...basketball. Jalissa is a freshmen at St. Clair High School and is very in involved in all aspects of the high school life. she is even coaching the "little angels" at Biddy Basketball on Saturday mornings. 


Kathy continues to Deck the Halls at Crull Elementary School in Port Huron. She is in her 27th year of teaching 2nd grade. Kathy loves being a grandma and hanging out with Grandpa. 


Grandpa Jon was downsized in January. And even though the weather outside if frightful, God continues to be delightful. Jon has been working on getting licensed and certified in the health insurance industry. Jon is a senior market advisor working for himself and helping seniors make sense of the new health care changes that have taken place over the past 12 months. Jon is also coaching JV Girls Basketball at St. Clair High School. 


We look forward to hearing from each of you, 
We wish you a merry Christmas! 

I feel like I should post

But there isn't much to write about. Actually, there is so much to write about...if you want to hear about my spiritual life, and what I am learning from God through prayer, scripture and other people. A WHOLE LOT. Some hard stuff. Some deep stuff. Some stuff that will seriously change me.

But other than that, I am officially on Christmas break, which means it is time to get on my to do list. Get ready for Christmas, shop, wrap, Christmas cards, clean the house, work on meals for this weekend (2 family gatherings in 2 days at our house), work out like crazy because I have the time to do so, redo 2 bedrooms, buy a computer and photoshop and learn how to use them, take more pictures, decorate more, spend time with friends, clean--super duper clean......

And that's it. Kind of boring, right?

No Matter What.

Friends no matter what. 

I will stand by you no matter what. 

We will keep in touch, no matter what. 

I will love you no matter what. 

I have spoken these words to friends, family and my husband, sometimes I really did mean those words, other times it was a nice courtesy, but most times it meant.... 

I will love you as long as you love me. 

I will support you as long as you don't do me wrong. 

I will be there for you, if and only if you are there for me. 

I will be there, but lose my trust and I'm gone. 

I will love you until you leave dirty dishes on the table, give me a gas-less car, forget to call me when you know you will be late, etc.  

I will love you until you keep me up all night with your tears. 

What a selfish beast I am? Now you know some of the deep parts of my heart, the honest, dirty, sinful, selfish parts. I love conditionally, yet long for unconditional love. 

God has been challenging me in such a deep way in how I love others. He has challenged me to love Him, and His people no matter what. It is a hard painful process. A lot of my flesh tells me that it is ok to hold grudges, to not forgive, and to certainly not be in tight community with people who have hurt me, who I don't see eye to eye with, for those who don't get me. But that's not what He has said. He has said no matter what. 

So here I am in this journey. 

Trying so hard to love no matter what. 

To show show love when I am tired and depressed. 

To put others far above myself and my own agenda. 

To love others when it hurts. 

To love others when I don't feel loved back. 

This journey is hard, I am so glad that I have a husband who is standing by me in this, who is spurring me on, reminding me of my convictions and putting words to my emotions. How God  has blessed me. 

Christmas Photo Shoot

Over thanksgiving, I received some help getting some Christmas photos with Caleb. He is soooo busy, it is hard to do a planned shoot, I have to just get random shotss.

So....thanksgiving weekend, lots of people, = planned photo shoot.

Complete with a Santa Hat.

This is how Caleb felt after the shoot was done.