One

It is hard to believe that one year ago today I was coming to terms with the idea that God was not going to give us a baby for Christmas. I was struggling through the holidays, with faith, that eventually we will be a part of pursuing God's kingdom by caring for orphans. Just not that year. Holidays can be emotional anyways when you are grieving the loss of someone. In many ways, I was grieving the loss of Noelle, but in more ways I was grieving my prayer life. I thought for sure I had God say we would have a baby for Christmas. I was questioning my faith and whether or not prayer even worked.

Little did I know, an hour a way, there was a scared woman, in labor 3 months early. She had been in the hospital for a few weeks prior to Christmas, but decided (against the advice of the hospital) to leave the hospital, to go home to spend Christmas with her family. She found herself back in the hospital in labor. One

December 27, my son was born. I did not know he even existed at that time. Jon and I were even talking about going through foster care and other means of opening our homes up for children. He was born 3 months early at a whopping 3lbs! It wouldn't be until January 9th that we heard about our Caleb boy, but today, we celebrate his birth!

Today, Mr. Caleb, you are the light of our lives. You mean more to us that we could ever ask for or even explain to you. You have given us such joy and we cannot imagine life without you. We are slowly navigating how to be parents, specifically how to be white parents to an African American boy. We want you to know and appreciate your culture. We want you to love it, it is how God has created you. Wen want you to grow up to be a man that pursues Jesus with all of his heart, a man of prayer and a man that know the Word. We want you to feel like you can always come home, that you can come to us with anything and that your parents will be your support system.

Today....you are almost 20lbs, you are putting syllables together to form words, crawling like crazy, walking between the furniture, LOVING your new Christmas gifts, eating everything, sleeping 10 hours a night, taking 1-2 naps throughout the day, have 2 teeth and a contagious smile.

Today....we are going to cut your hair.

Today.....we celebrate you baby boy.